Friday, December 28, 2012

A Kiss Is Still A Kiss

Think about what society has made out of the kiss. It's something that happens so naturally, is so beautiful, and yet we toss it around, several times in one night for the frivolity and feel of it. The actual purpose of a kiss has been lost by many, and I too have fallen. For a long time, I just wanted physical affection and I ached for someone else's touch. It hurt that I wasn't being held! I wondered if there was something in me that was too unlovable for this world.

But someone invented the kiss, and they knew how it would impact the earth. William Goldman, the writer of the Princess Bride (book), understood the kiss in true depth and showed it through wonderful writing. The problem with this world is that The Princess Bride hasn't permeated society the way it should have. So there are people that go through this life without the full realization of a kiss's purpose, because they must rely on this corrupted society to tell them what kisses are.

It's a little difficult to swim your way out of the mainstream, much less stay afloat. I'm not entirely sure who it was that threw me a lifesaver, and, assuredly, I'm grateful to them. But I'm a little preoccupied with watching the muddy river and wondering how I can save them. It occurs to me to use the dying art of literature, but the sad fact is that few people read an actual page these days, so my only alternative is to use that glaring screen to my benefit. So I'm going to try and write a sensible sort of statement, detailing the way I feel about kisses.

I've had a lot of time to think about what a kiss means. The kind of things you express when you give someone a peck. The kinds of things you're saying when a kiss on the cheek somehow becomes more steamy than was originally planned. I love how you can tell what a man thinks of you by the way he kisses you as well. There are those kisses where you don't say anything and the two of you sort of... lean in to it together and meet up halfway. I like it when he asks for permission.

But a kiss is far more than just something to be enjoyed. It's the single most effective way to communicate to someone how you feel. Other than hitting... And there you have two opposite ends of the spectrum. As far as "brutality" is concerned, a smack can range from a playful "love tap" to defending your honor to disrespecting someone. A kiss, however, is fairly straightforward. It's a sign of attraction. At least it should be. The world is the ultimate, all-time, highest level, grand master of corrupting original purposes. Shakespeare has reminded us that "the Devil can cite scripture for his own purposes," and I think everybody's caught onto that and applied it to their lives.

To me, a kiss is the highest form of respect any person can give to the opposite gender. I don't kiss someone unless I respect them entirely. That's why I can get excited about kissing/being kissed because I treat it better than the rest of my high school classmates and a few of my college associates. To me, a kiss allows me to be close to someone. I willingly let myself be vulnerable to them, so it's a sign of trust. As anyone close to me will know, I have the tendency to get myself hurt. I made mistakes in deciding to trust people, so to the battle-scarred and worn Hannah, trust is sort of a big thing.

Maybe I would be happier if kisses didn't mean such a big deal to me. Maybe if things were all nice and  consistently non-commital, I wouldn't get my hopes up and subsequently hurt all the time. Or maybe I can hold on to the one shred of decency I can find in this world. When you realize that things are only as special as the worth we give  to it, then you can bring importance and purity back into an otherwise messy and undignified world.


  1. Another good commentary on kissing is this:

    “The more the dollar is printed, the less each one is WORTH. And so it is with kisses you’ve given since your birth. The VALUE of your kisses, a sample cannot measure, nor is your kiss more worthy if it’s said to give one pleasure. The more and more you give away, the better your kiss is known. And to all the world, your kiss is cheap and affection shown. But if you SAVE your kisses, no matter the cost, you’ll find as time moves forward, a chance you’ve saved, not lost! Then when you find the one you love, with whom you’ll live life through. Think of the worth of a PERFECT kiss, if saved for only you.”

    ― Alvin Jones

  2. Personally, I don't think you need to change anything about your mentality. Thinking that kisses don't mean anything is not only wrong, but stupid. It will devoid your life of attainable romance. Instead, may I suggest finding someone who feels the same way you do? I may have expressed that the man I am currently interested in has told me that he does not kiss anyone unless he is going to date them or currently dating them. Although this means I have not been kissed yet (and maybe never will by him), I am incredibly grateful for this respectful gesture. I know he won't raise false hopes in me.

    1. Well, these were some musings of mine. I generally don't plan on changing my opinions. This is more of a... "wake up world, put your pants back on and get to work" sort of realization that everyone needs to hear.