Thursday, May 9, 2013

Mission Log, Stardate 5/8/13: Get Your Shine On

It's no surprise that I'm titling an email with a phrase from a not-hymn song. At least, not to my district. We have a daily thought on our whit eboard and yesterday, when everyone was having a hard time, I wrote "Carry on my wayward son, there'll be peace when you are done." I kind of feel bad for bringing "Babylon into Zion" so I made a deal with one of the elders in my district that I can hum any song if I can find a corrolating scripture. So far, I've got "Below My Feet" (Alma 29:1), "Get Your Shine On" (Matthew 5:16), "Carry On My Wayward Son" (2 Timothy 4:7-8), "She's A Lady" (Proverbs 31:10), and "Stayin' Alive" (Psalms 23:4). It's now a personal challenge, so send me songs that I know and I'll make 'em spiritual. I do this to keep me awake when I start slipping.

I leave for Texas on the 14th, and boy oh boy, do I need the 14th to get here NOW. I need HEAT. I froze to death every night until a sister trainer told me I could get more blankets. I sleep with four blankets now. While wearing my sweatshirt. The things I have to do.... But I'm also genuinely excited to get out into the field and start my work!!

The funniest thing about being in the MTC us how strangely familiar it is. It's a BYU campus, so it smells like the HFAC and Heritage Halls and I want to go back to Theatre Camp... I feel like I should be dancing all day, but I love the work more. Benjamin Landart said "the greatest decision I ever made in my life was to give up something I dearly loved to the God I loved even more." So I don't REALLY miss dancing... Not really.

So all the n00bs came in today. I can't believe I've already been here a week!! But here's the thing about the MTC.... You walk in all "YAY!" (and in my case, that was.... rather literal) and then Satan comes over the second day and ultimate punches you in the stomach. Cuz guys, the MTC is HARD. Satan takes advantage of that! I've been leaning on my guns this whole week, reminding myself why I'm out here. They really throw you into the deep end and I've been treading water. I watched these newbies walk in, eyes big as dinner plates, and said sarcastically "aw, they're so happy!... Their souls will be crushed by tomorrow." I was quickly reprimanded by my Zone Leader, and then I had to sing an uplifting hymn. This kind of thing happens everyday. I can testify to you as a witness of God that your soul WILL remain intact-- IF you follow Jacob's counsel in Jacob 3:1. Not only will you remain intact, but you will become stronger. You will be able to lift heavier burdens, even the ones around you. My companion and I got hit really hard at the beginning of the week, but because of that, we were able to cheer up our district when they got hit.

I struggled, you guys. Like, I definitely thought about coming home. 'Till I realized that it just wasn't an option. Obviously, God wouldn't have called me out here for 3 days. I've got work to do, and when that happens, you pull your big-girl pants on and start working harder. You study harder. You pray so much harder than you ever have in your life. I had no idea the MTC was this hard, but the way I see it... Eternal Damnation is a little harder than a couple of weeks of 9 hour blocks of class.

The struggling, however, has taught me many things. Specifically, I've re-learned how to pray. After listening to some investigators pray, I decided to start saying my prayers in that kind of mindset. Because we teach these investigators to get to know God by truly pouring out their souls, I feel like their prayers have meant more than mine. Mormons get so used to their slang and their patterns that they forget to actually FEEL. At least, that was how it was in my case. So I've started praying with the intent to know God, and it has made ALL the difference!! I'm actually talking to God instead of a ceiling. I'm a little ashamed to admit that the only times I've poured out my heart and soul have been when I was struggling. That's.... no bueno.

I miss y'all. So very dearly. And I love your letters! Like I said, I leave May 14th, so soon, you should send letters to the Texas address. I love you guys. The church is true, Jesus Christ lives, and that makes the work worth doing. I'm gettin' my shine on and ENJOYING THE WORK!
Love, Sister Gunson

No comments:

Post a Comment